What's Going On Lately

 I have been watching a lot of YouTube videos about near death experiences, and then moved on to channeled angels and things like that.  Apparently this is a period called Ascension and my own life experiences with spirituality makes this make sense to me.

I still need to get a handle on life stuff - caring for mom and dad and cats and family, friends, and just the work - being on top of it and not so far behind.

I remember being a person who was full of joy and laughter and I want to return to that.  I'm not exactly sure what all happened.  I'm lucky to have been raised in a family with a lot of love.  Particularly by my mom and family.

I'm also lucky to have had the experiences I've had.  It's dawning on me that I created them, whether from my soul without my conscious knowing or bungling some of it up on my own consciously and subconsciously.

I want to get my life in order enough to have some structure in my days to pursue all these classes, lessons, interviews, and readings which I'm attracted to but only dabble in because it feels like I never have enough time.

I also feel more serous about getting healthier.  Vegan, whole plant foods, and juicing.  Walking and rebounding.  Dancing and feeling and spreading joy to many.

I want to use my talents and skills to help the world.  There are so many who are owning their spiritual journeys and letting them guide them into their life's purpose - and I want to do that too.

Melody is a gift I'm grateful for.  She's an adorable love bundle just as she is.

I want to get this house beautiful, connect better with my dad, care well for my mom and help her get healthier and stronger.  I'm hoping she'll make it out of the hospital.  I regret not doing more to encourage her to exercise, to switch to plant-based broth with her rice soup.

I can hear them faintly now, and do feel I am somehow connected to them, they watch over me and I matter to them.  I regret not doing more when I was younger to have a bigger impact in the world.  At one time I had larger dreams.  Perhaps with time they will grow again and I can have a great and good impact.

I should probably get some sleep.  Sending love to my mom in the hospital, my dad upstairs, my cat and the garden and stray cats, Louis and children, and all my friends and family.

Focusing on myself, here's what I want to change:

- not be so late with work any more

- get enough sleep

- care for mom and dad better

- care for the cats better so they don't have a long wait

- be a better communicator with patience and kindness and good listening

- start meditating

- start my courses

- eat whole food vegan plant-based and juice

Why would I lose my voice and those who took it laugh?  When can I get it back?  What does this mean?  It seems hard to get answers to this.

I want to know more about those who have talked to and with me.  Those I can hear even now.  I feel they are good.

I also want to know more about myself, my family and friends, and my soul family.

There's just a lot I want to know.